Latest Hysteria from the Press

Now it appears we have to worry about giant pythons invading the United States (what a joke!). Because of so-called global warming, the southern part of the US will soon become prime habitat for the giant snakes who can slither along at 20 miles per hour and squeeze a man to death. Excuse me for being a skeptic, but I'm wondering if there aren't more important things to worry about. Like the unbelievably-destructive-we're-certainly-all-going-to-die-run
for-the-hills-bird flu.